Sunday, August 09, 2015

the next stage begins

slightly dark iPhone photo of her room.

we dropped the child off at her efterskole today. it's a boarding school about a half an hour away, where she, along with 199 other 9th and mostly 10th graders, will focus on academics and gymnastics for the next school year. she was packing for days and was very much looking forward to going. i think the only thing she's worried about is missing her friends, but she made sure she spent loads of time with them over the past few weeks and it's not like she isn't still in a group chat or two with them.

we helped her unpack her things into a single small cupboard and make up her single bed in her 3-person dorm room. the other girls and their parents were there doing the same and there wasn't much chat between us, but that's typical in denmark. i think they were probably freaked that we were speaking english, which sabin and i always do and that made them hold back even more than usual. her roommates seemed like sweet girls, so i'm sure she's going to be fine.

they gave the parents quite a stern lecture about allowing their young people the freedom to unfold and truly experience life at school and not text them all the time and expect them to come home every weekend. i didn't really feel that the lecture applied to us as sabin's parents, since we have been known to leave her unattended in the country (just for a few hours when our flight paths crossed) or to put her on an 8-hour plane ride by herself or let her take the train to copenhagen for the weekend to visit friends or go off to italy with a friend on summer holiday. we're not clingy parents and have spent her first 14 years preparing her for this day.

looking around the room, there were parents (mostly mothers) with tears in their eyes at the prospect of letting go of little anders and little camilla, but i didn't feel sad, what i mostly felt was excited for her. i think i've said it before, but it feels like the next step. it's what she should be doing. getting very into her interest (gymnastics) and working on it intensively with the support of talented teachers/coaches. learning how to buckle down and study. learning to rely on herself and find her own inner strength. figuring out who she is and who she wants to be. we've given her a strong foundation, she's a good kid and she's going to have a n awesome year.

it will be a bit quieter around here, but we'll be ok. and so will she.




2 comments:

Molly said...

Big moment! Well done for being so sensible about it - I think I might have been one of those mothers with tears in my eyes but then it is hard for me to imagine having an independent 14 yr old right now.
Did you go home and walk around the house naked cooking all the food she doesn't like and listening to 'cringe-worthy' music? I think I might be one of those mothers too ...

Anonymous said...

I must confess that I've never really understood the lament that 'oh don't you wish you could turn back time?'. Yes, children change and grow so fast. Faster than you believe! But I don't yearn to go back to the baby stage. I can look at photos from last year, appreciate the baby chub, the practically bald head, and remember that time fondly. But I don't want to go back. I like to look forward. At age almost-two, B will play by himself quite happily for ages. He has more-or-less free reign over out garden. He is independent and happy. And so are we.

Congrats Sabin, I am sure you will have a fantastic time! (And congrats Mom & Fa too!)