a new chapter

tomorrow, a new chapter begins and i am so ready! copenhagen, here i come! the job has already started off right and i've not even officially started. we had a little getaway to oslo as a family here during the autumn holiday and it was a pretty awesome way to kick things off! it's so gorgeous sailing up through the oslo fjord and the seas were completely calm. very cool introduction to the product! and i can't wait to dig in tomorrow!

new beginnings are so exciting, i feel a bit like a kid on the first day of school. i have a new alice in wonderland themed moleskine to use for my work notes and when i get to work, a new phone and computer will be waiting for me. i feel the old familiar autumn excitement i used to get when a new semester of college was starting up. new clothes, new notebooks, the smell of leaves in the crisp autumn air. i can't wait!

resisting fundamentalism

amber waves of grain in denmark, but it could just as easily have been taken in south dakota

with the child away at boarding school this year and with plans for her to go to high school in my little hometown in the states next year, we are easing back into the life of an adult couple around here. we're less likely to eat dinner at a specific time, we watch netflix or hbo nordic until midnight, we sit in the garden and have deep philosophical discussions, or lie on the trampoline and stare at the sky, we spontaneously decide to go out to dinner. we do miss her, but it continues to be ok in our minds that she's moving on to the next step. plus, without her around, there's no one plaguing us to build a pool.

it might be different next year when she's an ocean away, rather than just 30 minutes. i also worry about how religious that little town i grew up in has become. yes, there were always 12 churches, but it seems that aggressive christianity is just so much more pervasive than when i was a kid. even in the answers given to reporters for stories like this one. such a tragic and yet heartwarming story and yet they had to go all jesus at the end. i worry about that. i see it as a symptom of fundamentalism no less heinous than that purveyed by the taliban and isis. 

in denmark, some immigrants talk about sending their children back to their home country for genopdragelse - or "re-raising." this, in most instances, means back to pakistan or turkey to learn the old ways and be more in touch with their native religion. in my case, while i want sabin to learn more of where she comes from and how much her grandfather meant to the community, i do not want her to be steeped in religion while she's there. i love the secular life we lead in denmark. i love that what people believe is personal and private and not flashed in everyone's face all of the time; you don't have to participate in religious rituals to be considered a good member of society. i love that the child wisely said, in choosing to be baptised and confirmed, that you can be interested in god without believing in god. in denmark, there are even ministers who admit they don't believe. that would never fly in small town south dakota.

i am confident that sabin is a strong person with a good head on her shoulders. she has a quality where she is able to float above the fray without being snooty or arrogant. she seems at once grounded and above it all, which is a delicate balance to strike and i don't think it's something you can learn (i certainly don't have it), i think it's something you must have in you innately. i'm hoping it gets her through the year in a community where the aggressive, fundamentalist christianity of the local youth group forces the young people to hammer hundreds of nails into a cross to represent their many sins. talk about a need for genopdragelse...

my cousin, who she's going to stay with while she's there, isn't like that, but it may be hard to resist when the social life in the little town is steeped in religion. i understand that they may have forgotten some of the separation of church and state mandated by the constitution - with ministers speaking at graduation and prayers at the sports ball games. we'll have to see what can be done about those things, without placing the child in the middle of a fight. we simply have to be vigilant against fundamentalism in all of its incarnations if we're to stop this downward spiral the world is on...maybe we have to do that right here, in our own backyards, just by beginning to question it and not just accepting it when it's shoved down our throats. it must be possible for a community to rally around an orphaned young man without bringing god into it.

100 happy days :: day 79

i love this time of year, when the rapeseed fields are in full bloom, their mustardy brilliance cutting through even our weirdly dark, windy, rainy, autumnal spring. i couldn't resist this road, lined on both sides by their golden brightness, a straight path, leading somewhere exciting.

at least we have cake

expectations, they'll kill you in the end. humans are unpredictable and disappointing. i'm trying to learn to let go of them (the expectations, not the humans), but it's an uneven process. and some things are harder to let go of than others. matters of personal integrity, for example. and no matter how much you conduct yourself with honesty and integrity, there will always be people in your path who do not and they will view you through their own clouded glasses, assuming that you must be like them.

additionally, you can never underestimate people's need for their albanian (you know, that person they feel superior to).  and if you happen to be the only one in the group who isn't a member of the tribe, you will likely, whether you deserve it or not, become that albanian. and it will royally piss you off. and by you, you might have guessed, i mean me. and you will have vivid moments where you imagine indulging your inner slayer. and you think, buffy wouldn't take this shit, she'd kick some serious ass. so you do decide to stand up for yourself. but you still can't help but feel like it's all been a case of junior high-style bullying. but this too shall pass. and there truly are bigger and better things to look forward to.

like sabin's birthday tomorrow. she'll be 12! it all goes so fast. but we spent the afternoon making cupcakes together. a sort of a rainbow theme (it's apparently what her classmates requested). i've gone easy on the presents, she doesn't have much she really needs, but of course she needs a few treats. so she will have them, along with the dinner of her choice. and the bunnies just might surprise her by having their babies tomorrow - there was a lot of nest-building going on today. and she will have another cake since she's taking all of the cupcakes to school. happily, we're allowed to do that here (i've heard there are places where homemade treats aren't allowed). so at least there's still common sense on that front and that's something.

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such beautiful, inspiring work:

Handed on from Chakris Kussalanant on Vimeo.

fog brings clarity

i love a foggy morning. with the fog, there's a hush, a dampening of the noise of the world. out of the fog comes, most strangely, a kind of clarity. likely due to the stillness and the quiet - we finally breathe deeply and our heads clear in the silence. as i wandered the yard, taking these photos, only a few minutes ago, the only sound (other than the occasional crow of one of our many roosters), was the occasional plop of big drops falling from the trees. it brought such a feeling of calm over me.

i find my thoughts already turning to the end of the year and to the new year ahead, from what has been to what may yet be. looking towards what may be approaching out of the fog, but feeling quite unafraid of it, instead, looking forward with a tingle of excitement that comes of the stirrings of imagination as to what may be.

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slavoj zizek is a lunatic. he keeps his clothes in the kitchen cupboards.
(hmm, might be worth pondering why i feel that's a symptom of lunacy.)

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it was time someone said this about anthropologie. 

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the meeting i attended on wednesday (which, for the first time i can remember, has actually inspired me to think i have a novel in me and not just non-fiction) was well-reported in our local paper.  (only in danish, but if you can read it, you should). the best bit about it that you should know is that while brock is a name, if you leave out the c, it means both complain and hernia and that in pronunciation, the two words are indistinguishable. and if you only knew how very fitting that was in the context. there is a changing of the guard from old to young and it's painful for all concerned. don't you think that's a good underlying story for a novel?

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the e boards: Education (a shared board, work-related, hence the capital letter), environmentally conscious. ethnic. excess of eggs.

happy monday!

look at that glorious morning! i took this just minutes ago, when i went to let the chickens out. it's supposed to be rather cold this week and even down below freezing a couple of nights, but it feels like spring will win out in the end - it can't be beaten back forever by arctic winds.

it's easter week - sabin's off from school all week and tho' i'm working on a big project, there will be time for riding and making things (a vow to make at least one thing every day inspired by something i've pinned on pinterest will help that) and yummy food and some visitors later in the week and a bit of gardening and lots of taking photos.

happy monday, one and all!  i'll be back later with today's pinspiration creation.

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in case you didn't see it yesterday - this is wickedly clever.

lovely shining monday

we took a little family outing to the west coast today. as we drew nearer, the sun came out and since it was about 10°C (or 50°F), it was downright balmy, despite the strong winds blowing in off the north sea.

 and the light. oh, the light.

an afternoon of sea and sand and wind and golden light has completely realigned my very soul.

i am definitely ready for the new year now! bring it on!

manifesting and reverberating

i keep reading about this reverb10 thing around the blogosphere. and while i'm not much of a groupie (oh please, who am i kidding?), i'm really enjoying the stories i've seen here and there and everywhere. and as we know (perhaps all too well), i'm a reflective sort of a person and i'm definitely up for some manifesting of 2011. after all, writing is the new praying (a concept i feel a bit like i lost sight of as 2010 progressed).

so, since's already dec. 7, i think i'll do a quick catch up all-in-one post.

dec. 1 - one word: as we well know, one word is a bit difficult for me. i'm a wordy one. and i hate choosing or committing myself to but one thing. you see, i like LOTS of words - challenge, beauty, peace, mindfulness, sophistication, travel, create, meditate. but if i think about what one word marked 2010 it would have to be change. we changed our home, our jobs, our entire lifestyle. 2010 has been all about change - changes we chose, but changes that were at times difficult nonetheless. if you'd asked me at the beginning of 2010, i would have said i wanted it to be about creativity, but i'm afraid it wasn't that. not nearly enough. and if i think towards 2011 and what i'd like to have it be about, it would have to be daring. i want to dare in 2011.

dec. 2 - writing: "what do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?" what gets in the way of my writing is that i drain my energy on things i shouldn't drain it on. but as of today (dec. 7), the main energy drain has been jettisoned, so i expect that to change already now in 2010. and i can't WAIT to see what happens in 2011 with my writing (and everything else) now that my energy is my own again.

dec. 3 - moment: "pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year." it was a perfectly gorgeous long midsummer evening. the light stayed around 'til almost midnight. the three of us - husband, sabin and i - walked down to our lake, which was as smooth as glass in the golden evening light. the reeds and iris along the edges, whispering in the occasional very slight, warm breeze. we launched our little old boat and paddled around, out to the gorgeous lilypads where i took photos to my heart's content while we laughed and talked together. tho' it was high summer and we were on water, there were no pesky mosquitos. it was just the most perfect, happy, golden evening, together with my two favorite people on the planet.

dec. 4 - wonder: i think a big contributor to my moments of wonder during 2010 has been my 365 photo project. the act of having to look around me and find something to photograph every single day often made me stop and notice my surroundings in way that i wouldn't normally have done if i weren't doing such an intentional project. i want to somehow carry that intentionality into 2011 (tho' maybe without being quite so slavish about it - and daring to take more photos in film only).

dec. 5 - let go: it was a year of much change and i sadly let go of our old house, my blue room and my red smeg. i also let go of a most beloved professor. but i think the worst thing i let go of this year was far too much of my energy and to causes that didn't deserve that essential part of me. that's going to change in 2011.

dec. 6 - make:  what is the last thing i made?  this relates to that energy above...i can't really think of what the last thing i made was and that concerns me. i sewed quite a bit for sabin in october and i made a christmasy centerpiece for the dining table with hyacinths yesterday, but i'm not sure that counts. i let that diminished energy make me less creative and that's precisely what i want to avoid in 2011. we're decorating a new bedroom for sabin for christmas and i'm going to start by making a cuddly quilt for her new room tomorrow when i get up.

dec. 7 - community:  where did i find community in 2010? i definitely found it in the BC365 project group on flickr.  and when we moved, we found community in the real world on our new road - nice and helpful neighbors with good stories to tell. i was fortunate to find community among some really wonderful people who i worked with in manila during november. and i can't forget the wonderful weekend at blog camp berlin. so community both in cyberspace and in my actual community. can't really ask more than that.

i think this reverb10 thing is going to be quite cathartic. would you like to play along too? imagine what we can all manifest in 2011 if we just write it all down? writing is the new praying. i'm not going to forget that again.

there's no place like...

as i was packing up the bookshelves in the blue room, i took a moment to arrange these blocks against the beloved blue background. they're letterpress blocks from my dad's letterpress (why didn't i learn how to operate that when i had the chance?). i think they once assembled to spell the name of some or other horse that i had, and i've carried them around the world with me more than once. they're precious and i wouldn't want to be without them, even if they are occasionally jumbled into a box and not used.

moving brings on such mixed feelings. i'm excited and looking forward to the new house and all that we're going to do it to transform it into the house we'd like it to be. i'm going to love having our own lake and a lawn big enough to play football on (not that i want to do that, but knowing that i could is a good thing). space for a horse and chickens and maybe a truffling pig or two, oh and lambs. i'm so looking forward to all of that.

but i've loved this house too and we did so much to it to make it our own and give it our character and leave our mark on it. when we moved in, it was like stepping into a 70s time warp, even the garden looked like some evergreen-covered churchyard, full of low bushes that even looked totally seventies. we leave it transformed and we will miss it.

but as i said when i posted this picture on flickr the other day, we are not our house and we are able to make a home wherever we go. because the things that make a home are all of the things, packed with memory and meaning, that we take with us. even if it is a royal pain packing them all up.

wistful winding down

it's my second to last time this year in a hotel room in oslo. although i'm a little tired of these generic, uninteresting hotel rooms and the limited range of channels on t.v., i am feeling a little wistful about it. it's been a great year. it's been a fun job, a privileged situation to work from home so much and to travel to places i love and best of all, i've worked with great people who always welcome me when i come up, even when i'm feeling a little uncomfortable about coming up after not being here for a few weeks. they have never, ever made me feel that way. just super people.  although there is a very good chance i will still be working up here in 2009, it will be with a different department, so i feel a bit wistful about not working together with this group. it feels like a chapter is ending.

another of the things i will miss at least for a few weeks (since i'm not starting with the new group until sometime in january (still being worked out exactly when)) is the posh mall food at the food garage in sandvika storcenter. especially their posh pizzas and refreshing fruit drinks in unusual flavors (had rhubarb/vanilla today):

at the same time as feeling a bit wistful and even slightly nostalgic (which could at any moment slip over into sentimentality and i hate sentimentality), i'm pretty excited about the opportunity next year. i had a long conversation about it today and will again at the end of next week. and it's exciting and pretty much the ideal job for me. it involves a publication. and the web. and travel. and a fabulous camera (nikon D300 anyone?). and lots of pretty ships. and so my mind already well into next year and the first issue. i've got themes in mind for the whole year. and it feels pretty exciting and a little decadent in the face of global economic crisis and downsizing, to feel so engaged in a new job before i've even begun. and another chapter begins. or at least looks like it's going to in the new year.

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but on a lighter note, in the vein of WTF wednesday: what on earth was rod blagojevich thinking? who does the man think he is, tony soprano?