still thinking about char. feeling a bit better after reading beth's blog today. it's still not ok that she's gone and i miss her terribly...i had photo issues today and my immediate thought was, "i need to ask char what she would do." but i can't do that. and that's brought tears to my eyes more than once since i learned this yesterday morning.
this whole thing has left me thinking that passwords and last wishes about our cyberlives need to be included in our wills. i told husband that i want him to post on my blog, twitter, facebook, etc. if i die unexpectedly, letting everyone know. it's easy if he does it on one of my computers, as it all automatically signs in, so he doesn't even need to know my passwords, tho' he knows those too. but i would want to let everyone know what happened - whatever it may be. he told me to pre-write the post, so he could just post it, but if i could predict the future...
in all of this, i am grateful for this cyberlife we have. i love that char's blog lives on (and i hope it continues to do so), so i can go back to it and read it and feel close to her and remember her. and i treasure every comment she left on my blog even more so now than i did. (why is that we most appreciate that which we no longer have?)
it all brings up interesting questions of the reality of virtual friendship that i'm not yet finished processing. i feel as bereft losing char as if i'd lost a close friend that i knew in real life, even tho' we never met. she was a wonderful person and i am grateful that the slim chance that we would find one another here in cyberspace indeed worked. of all the blogs out there, i feel richer for mine having crossed paths with hers. we share so much of ourselves here (tho' it's impossible to share it all), that we may in some ways know one another better than we know our real life friends. it's a privilege that i hope to be more conscious of after losing char. it's the least i can do.
