Tuesday, October 11, 2016


it hit me recently that for the last half decade, i have felt invisible. it may have even been more than a feeling, i suspect i might have actually been invisible. i think it happens to women when we reach a certain age - and it really is a middle age - we're done having children, but haven't yet hit menopause. we become invisible somehow, perhaps biologically but certainly culturally. for me, a couple of soul-damaging workplaces didn't help. they shook the foundation of my very identity. and i struggled for a couple of years to not be where i work, but i also have to admit that it was a struggle that i lost. my work life fills a great hole within me and gives me a space in which i unfold who i am. this is both good and bad. because work can push me places that i wouldn't always want to go. happily, for a year now, that hasn't been the case and i feel like i have emerged and that i'm unfolding my wings once again and it seems like they still work and i can still fly. and i've become visible again.


Ariadne said...

You have been visible to me all the years I have been reading your blog and your very interesting posts! I always had the feeling of "I don't belong" for myself, maybe because I am a refuggee from a very young age.But no matter what I have survived! I am visible!And so are you!Hugs.

will said...

Random thoughts:
•Work is a metaphor for something else.
•Everything is elusive.
•Invisibility is a state of mind.
•Randomness, or luck, is the secret ingredient.
•There's no upside to aging, it's fatal
•Busy hands are better than a busy mind.
•Money can buy happiness.
•In a hundred years none of this will matter.
•We make children because of biological urges.
•Most people pretend they know stuff.

•Social media is heroin lite.
•Good teachers are rare.
•We preordain ourselves with limits.
•Politics & religion are real bummers.
•We incorrectly use our memories.

•Most women are smarter than men.
•Unless you’re a samurai, don’t sweat the rules.
•1926 was better than 2016, by a wide margin.
•Opposable thumbs made us superior to cows.
•Opinions are a form of herpes.

•Conservatives are scaredy-cats.
•Have fun but leave something tangible.
•George Carlin spoke Truth.
•Keep moving and ask questions.
•Life and pinball are similar.

julochka said...

@Ariadne - thank you. :-)

@Bill - there's a lot in here to unpack...and I'm no longer sure we're actually superior to cows. And I never liked pinball.

Spilling Ink said...

I can so relate to this - perhaps because we're the same age. It's funny though, I think of you as one of the most visible women who are the same age as I.