Sunday, July 12, 2009

secret 12 - i am a beauty queen failure

back in the early 90s, when i suddenly found myself thin and full of thoughts of revenge after a particularly nasty break-up, i decided to try to earn my way to the miss america pageant. i thought the best revenge on the bad boyfriend would be for him to have to see me on t.v. and realize what he had missed out on. it was a brilliant plan. except for one thing. although i tried TWICE, i utterly failed to make it to the miss america pageant. i could be miss state fair, but could not win my state pageant to save my life. looking back, there were a lot of reasons for this which i didn't understand at the time...mostly having to do with the fact that i had a brain and they weren't looking for that. i thought i would be the first smart miss america, you see. silly me.

i proved i could walk and sing
while wearing heels.
and i had a fabulous sparkly dress, don't you think?


and i especially love this very
absolutely fabulous patsy look...


note: this is a previously-revealed secret, but it might have escaped your attention since a lot of you came to MPC quite recently. i originally revealed it here. (do check it out to see how i rocked the tiara.) and i made a little list about it here.

20 comments:

spudballoo said...

Oh, oh , oh, oh, oh...there aren't any words. Can't find 'em...words all gone...wine all gone...snorted all over the lovely Macbook...

Um, nice frocks?

Love these secrets, need to slow down time as they are going too fast!

Stacey Childs said...

I love love love love love that you shared this! I think it is one of those very cool things that make a person who they are, and man, I would have chosen you. With those legs? And that dress? And the hair? (well maybe not the last two, but you did have great legs!)

Sarah Lulu said...

I think you might be the first beauty queen I know! It doesn't happen in Australia ..really at all.

Vancouver's Enviro Girl said...

Wow. Wow. Ummmm, yeah, wow. And love the tiara from the previous post.

Bill Stankus said...

Now that this has been revealed you'll need a new name and identity plus you will need to move someplace without electricity and computers. Gee, that's a shame.

Now, let's do some analysis on WHY YOU CUT BARBIE DOLLS into little pieces!

Tara Thayer said...

Did not previously escape my attention. Just for the record.
Are you wearing stockings in that last shot, or are those really your legs? Just asking. xoxo
ps my balderdash word is ovely. As in, you look ovely in that sparkly dress.

Char said...

Oh, that dress honey - that dress.

Shweta said...

Um. Wow. That tiara totally rocks on you! And the dress is perfectly enviable...

Can't wait for more secrets to be revealed!

Just Jules said...

hmmm I have not forgotten and love the fact that it keeps coming up - only because new pictures keep surfacing! ha

Cyndy said...

You still have a chance for revenge. Through your amazing blogging skills you could help create world peace!! Our farirblogmother™ = Miss Congeniality!! Nice.

Joanna Jenkins said...

That is some dress! If I'd been a judge I'd have voted for you :-)

Eternally Distracted said...

Brave, brave, brave lady. How are you going to top that in your world of secrets?!!

Extranjera said...

I already knew this. Yet, it still surprises me and like Bill says, this brings on a whole new dimension to the 'cutting up barbie dolls' situation.

What I loved most though with the pics was how in the 90s your face was supposed to be a different color than the rest of your body. And that you did amazingly well.

Oh, these take me back. And I'll even let it slip. Right here in the comments that I modeled and did fashion shows in my teens. Pre-fat, that is.

Janet said...

this may be my favorite of your secrets. and i think you were mahvelus dahling.

so do you still have the dress?

you know, there could be a new pagent -- Miss Blog Camp! pics could be posted and the rest of us could vote. we'd probably have to come up with a list of questions for all of the contestants. and definitely no swim suit competition. you all, of course, would have to choose Miss Congeniality.

*jean* said...

ooo break out the bolly and the stoli, patsy, you were robbed!!!

Molly said...

I'm with Bill on the Barbie thing, and TOTALLY with Ext on the face v body colour thing. And I still can't really believe this about you...
Will you encourage Sabin to participate in pageants?
;)

My name is Erin. said...

I guess I missed the fact somewhere along the line that you were American... from South Dakota? Cool. I'm assuming. I haven't been there, but I hear that there are gold in them thar mountains (or hills?) :)

Love the AbFab reference. You could have been Patsy's long lost daughter.

kristina said...

these secrets are getting scarier by the day. I don't know if I'll dare keep reading them ;-)

wv: watica --
- I follow julochka on twitta'.
- on watica?!

rxBambi said...

GREAT secret! One of my pharmacist friends is actually a beauty queen too (but she didn't make it to the big one either...too smart I think...)

Bravo for you for doing that and coming out wonderful!

Magpie said...

I'd forgotten this!