maybe i'm an anthropologist

i had a dream last night that i got lost in mall of america and couldn't find any exit. i knew going to that place would haunt me. of course, my dreams have taken place in a large mall for years, but they hadn't for awhile now. this time, i was aware that it was mall of america, whereas previously, it was the mall in my mind (a strange amalgamation of various malls in manila and singapore and possibly arizona). it's one of those dreams where i don't precisely remember what was happening other than that i couldn't find the exit and had wandered into one of those rather dimly-lit abandoned wings of it, but it's been flashing into my head all day. it feels a little bit like i never really woke up from it properly.

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i am so writing a book about this little town where i live (and probably the one where i grew up, since the types are similar). i gathered another set of character sketches this evening. we've got the one who fancies himself king, the troglodyte (sometimes hard to tell from the wanna-be king), we've got the cranky retired schoolteacher(s) who fear change and want everything to be as it always was and odin forbid we try something new, we've got the town drunk (who also happens to be a moron), we've got the charming eccentric, the earnestly engaged, we've got the upstart newcomer who is trying way too hard, we've got the politically astute, two local reporters, the welfare recipient and the one who calms everything down with humor. oddly, there are few women, i'm going to have to go back and observe some more.

i wonder if i might actually be an anthropologist.

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a little sad about not having a proper thanksgiving. the danes still haven't realized it's a holiday (despite realizing in the 15 years i've been here that valentine's day (which is totally made up by those flower people) and halloween are) so no turkey for us tomorrow. unless i spontaneously go acquire one. which would make my child happy. she's got some american genes, apparently, as she does love turkey. but i sure wish i was going to be together with my family! i'll at least have to make something pumpkiny tomorrow (later today?) and possibly a large chicken if i can't find a small turkey (denmark seems to think that duck is where it's at holiday birdwise).

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a new blog friend, who i met via the dinner list group on facebook. i only learned today she blogs (see what i mean about facebook diluting things?). and she also loves danish crime shows.

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you really must visit this odd and wonderful place - the odd luminary.

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the b boards on pinterest:  beautiful things, blue room (because i will have one again), bobbaloos, braids, and bunny rabbit.

sparkling in the blogosphere

i've thought about my recent blogosphere run-ins a bit more and what i think is behind them, in both cases, is actually a message to me that i wasn't welcome in those particular bloggy circles. because there are bloggy circles out here. and while i've tried very hard to have my own bloggy circle be a wide and inclusive one, not everyone feels that way. and while i undoubtedly don't always succeed, i think that save one instance with the flickr group where someone was just downright nasty to other members, i have never intentionally excluded anyone from my little corner of the blogosphere.

there's a particular gang on flickr that i honestly tried to be part of (the wanna-be 3191s, as i think of them (note: the REAL 3191 people are not part of that group and i am most definitely not implicating them)) and i was just thoroughly and roundly rejected. the whole tumblr photo thing was with a member of that circle and it was just, at the base of it, another message to me that i wasn't part of their gang. so i've long given up. as i realized i didn't need the validation of a few stuck-up snobs in order to feel ok with myself and my photos and well, my life. there's way more validation and warmth and life to be had in my own bloggy/flickr circles.

i think the other one was signaling that i don't really belong in another of the crafty circles. my experiments in natural dyeing are sporatic at best, as are my stitching efforts. i love contemporary fabrics. i don't fit. i'm not one of them (i felt that last winter with the slow cloth group on facebook) and that's ok with me too. while i thought it was only a compliment to link to the beautiful and inspiring things that people are sharing online, apparently you should only do that if you're of them.

jenna wrote recently of being a jack of all trades and proud of it. i guess that's a bit where i'm at too...of late, my interest has been in sewing clothes for sabin. i've also been knitting a bit here and there. my cooking interests are subdued at the moment by my horrible old kitchen, but they will return as well. and i will go back to the stitching and i'm still following many inspiring blogs, but i guess i have to be content with my place in the scheme of things. and actually, i am. it is just jarring to be told outright that you don't belong.

but that's not how i want to be and the only thing i can change is my own view on these things and know that in both instances, my intentions were good, and that's really all i can say.

a big thank you to everyone for your supportive comments and the reminder that things aren't all awry in the blogosphere. i have put up a small blogroll once again, but this time, it's a link up under my header. i will be changing it regularly and keeping it small, so if you're worried that you're not there at the moment, you just might be the next time you look.

happy weekend one and all...