just a man singing to his pig head

it's kind of funny that i actually read this article on why classical music is awful AFTER sunday's opera café at our local kulturhus (culture house - it somehow sounds weird in english). but i do think that richard dare is definitely onto something.

classical music - orchestras, opera, even ballet - have built up such a veil of snobbery around them, that i think that many people find them inaccessible. i know that's what i heard around our little town when it was announced that there would be an opera café - featuring excerpts from henry purcell's dido & aeneas and bach's coffee cantata, performed by professional musicians from one of the nearby academies.  i'll admit i even thought it myself when the group said they were going to sponsor an opera arrangement. i thought it was very brave to find an audience for an afternoon of opera in a little town of 3500 farmers.

i've seen quite a lot of opera (and ballet) in my day, mostly because it was on nearly every night at the operahouse in kazan when i studied there. tickets were incredibly cheap and my friends and i went all the time - it was fun to see the costumes, the artists were high quality (it was only a couple years after the fall of the soviet union and in the very theatre that produced nureyev) and they had great georgian champagne for pennies during the pause. even there, tho', people got dressed up in their best clothes (whether they went together or not) and followed some unspoken norms of when to clap and when not to that i'm not sure i ever entirely understood being the cultureless american i was (Q:  what's the difference between americans and yogurt? A:  yogurt has culture).

and now back to our regularly-scheduled topic....why does it have to be that way? so stiff and proper. opera is full of high drama, emotions and yes, even comedy (seriously, are you not amused by this man and his pig?), so why shouldn't we clap with delight and laugh when it's funny? it's what was great about our sunday afternoon opera arrangement  - that it being out here in the boonies, on a makeshift stage in the former lobby of the local city hall meant that none of us quite knew how to behave. we didn't quite clap at the right times and tho' we didn't entirely let ourselves go and really enjoy it out loud, we came close.

opera served up in an intimate space, with the whole room as the stage, not separating audience and performers, and even a bit of audience participation here and there, went a long way towards breaking the boring, stiff barrier around classical music. we did it quite instinctively, without a lot of academic overanalysis, but i think we're on the right track.

a happy list

because my last post was a little bit sad and i hate to go to bed on a sad note, i have to shake it all off with some positivity (sorry if it's insufferable, but it's where i'm at right now. and blogging is cheaper than therapy). and i know i'm not supposed to confess to happiness anymore (thanks molly), but just enjoy it. but still, we're made to think we should feel a little bit guilty about it, in the face of all of the unhappiness in the world...however, i give you a little list of things i like, and a gratuitous kitten photo.

i like:

~ instant coffee with a speck of cream. yes. i like instant coffee. and drink it all the time.

~ earrings that don't match each other.

~ pickled eggs.

~ being perceived of as a balanced person.

~ watching kittens play attack one another.

~ warming risotto when it's cold (and it's cold today, so you can guess what we had for dinner).

~ that my 11-year-old child's favorite program is called kontant and it's one where they expose consumer fraud (usually on the part of charter travel bureaus and people who sell fish from a truck).

~ that our baby bunnies have all found homes. :-(

~ that it's yet another holiday tomorrow.

~ and i'm going here.

~ i expect to come back fearless.

so watch out.

the erosion of a life

i have had opportunity to observe in recent weeks someone who i believe has had their happiness eroded away by living the wrong life. this results in what i can only characterize as a disease of negativity that infects every aspect of their behavior. every relationship, every interaction, every activity is permeated by negativity. which only serves to further isolate the person, because who wants to be around that?

i was talking to someone who referred to her (because of course it's a woman - it seems to me that men are much less likely to live the wrong life - tho' that's probably the stuff of a different blog post) as a person with no surplus. (it sounds better in danish - underskudsmenneske "deficit person" if i translate literally). it makes sense - a life full of small, petty frustrations, a lack of appreciation, stifled dreams, stymied ideas does wear you down and take away any surplus you might have otherwise had - surplus to let people be who they are, to do things their way, to have thoughts and ideas different than yours. when you lack a surplus you end up thinking it's just better to do everything yourself, since no one can do it the way you'd have them do it. there's no room for other people.

the person i observed walks as if it pains her a bit, shoulders rounded and hunched, as if she's protecting the last tiny shreds at the core of herself. she actually mumbles to herself nearly constantly, muttering complaints half under her breath and half audibly. she has occasional outbursts of anger that are bewildering for an observer to see how they could have arisen from the situation at hand. but it's because they don't. it's because, like a volcano, they are releases of an inner pressure based upon years and years of anger - perhaps at self, perhaps at others, probably a combination of both - and occasionally, they simply must erupt. 

fortunately, when i observed it yesterday, i was no longer in the throes of PMS-induced irritation, so i could observe, anthropologist-style and keep a cool-headed distance from all of the instructions i received in how to cut the sandwiches (i was obviously doing it wrong). yes, sandwiches were a source of unhappiness for this poor woman. at one point, i was filled with a kind of sorrow for her - because it must be horrible to live that way. we can all have bad days, but this definitely ran deeper than that. this was actually the result of a bad life.

i realize it's not entirely fair of me to say this, as i don't really know that much about this person's life.  but it seemed obvious to me, that the way life had worn at her edges, what happiness she may have once had was completely eroded away.

you wish you could take such a person by the shoulders, look deeply into her eyes and tell her to find a way to love herself. no matter what it takes. because the loathing of self and everything around her is so clearly not working. i wonder if on some level she can recognize it herself or if she's simply too far gone. i hope not, but i really don't know. i'd like to encourage her read this and this to see if helps.

hey big nose: the sculpture of leif grønhøj

stræberen (the seeker) by leif grønhøj

one of the pleasant surprises on the guided sculpture walk was that one of the artists was there himself! it was just coincidence that we actually finished up the tour looking at his pieces. i'd been walking along with him and his wife and talking with them about the other pieces all along and was pleased to find out he was one of the artists himself! his works are placed together in a grouping of 5 and tho' they weren't created together, they make for a very interesting and harmonious grouping.

stræberen (the seeker) by leif grønhøj

the artist was leif grønhøj, a sculptor from aalborg. you can see more of his work here. you may recognize this one from yesterday's crabby post.

anybody by leif grønhøj

he was in town because he had to repair one of the sculptures - this one called anybody. the danger of having art out in the open, where anyone can access it, is that people can get strange ideas. apparently someone decided to play football with mr. anybody and his left ear and eyebrow were damaged in the process.

anybody by leif grønhøj

leif was able to use the stone itself to make the repairs and you couldn't see at all where the damage had been. one consequence is that now mr. anybody is glued to his bronze pin that holds him to his base. leif doesn't normally glue the pieces, as they're more transportable if you can lift them off the base for transport, but in this case, where the pieces stand near a busy street in the center of town, they're simply too tempting and small enough to lift, so they had to be glued.

vogter I & II (guardian I & II) by leif grønhøj

our enthusiastic tour guide was telling a lively tale of what the guardians spent their time talking about. he did an awesome job of bringing the works to life. it was the best two hours i've spent in a long time.

big nose by leif grønhøj

leif described how the faces are simply there in the stone and he just coaxes them out. he said that big nose just had a big nose and it wasn't anything he really had control of - it was the way he was, there within the stone.

vogter I (guardian I) by leif grønhøj

he also talked a lot about the bases and how for him they are an integral part of the pieces, but that people often ask him about them and either love them or hate them. i though they were the perfect base for showing off the works. he also said he uses bronze pins to hold them up, as other metals would soon rust and color off onto the stone.

big nose by leif grønhøj

it was so interesting to listen to the artist talk about the various techniques and tools he uses to get different effects - polishers, small jackhammers and such. i love gathering stones on the beach, but haven't really considered looking for what characters lurk within.

vogter II (guardian II) by leif grønhøj

stone is such a marvelous material, living somehow, tho' cold and impassive at the same time. looking at these pieces, with their weird features and expressions, i definitely felt that they had indeed been lurking there in the stone all along, just waiting for leif to coax them out.

anybody by leif grønhøj (and that IS leif grønhøj on the right)

i wonder if future archaeologists will find such pieces and think we worshipped strange big-nosed gods or gazed towards the stars. and it makes me wonder if archaeologists read too much into what was just artistic expression in the idols and figures uncovered today.

one more shot of big nose by leif grønhøj

if you wanted to buy all five pieces, at the current exchange rate, they would run you $19,235 (116,000DKK). not quite bill's $25,000 = real art, but in my opinion, real art nonetheless. if you just wanted big nose (like i kinda do), he'll run you $3,814 (23,000DKK).

an outdoor art gallery

Væksttræet (The Tree of Growth) by Lithuanian artist Zilvinas P. Augustenas

Stjernekigger (Stargazer) by Japanese artist Koichi Ichiwata

Fragment by Erling Janum

Hjertekammer (Heart Chamber) by Niels Pedersen

Madonna by Liné Ringtved Thordarson

Selvomsorg (Self Sympathy) by Liné Ringtved Thordarson

Tanker (Thoughts) by Thomas Højsholm

Sky Boat by Bo Karberg

Give, the little town where i live (yes, i live in a town called give), is an outdoor art gallery, featuring 60 sculptures, which are placed all around the town. most of them are for sale, tho' some have become so loved by those who saw them regularly that they were purchased by groups or individuals in order to keep them here. i went on a guided tour yesterday, which was wonderful!  our guide was most knowledgable and enthusiastic.

tho' i think in many ways, art is what you make of it yourself, in your own head and heart, it brought the works alive for me to hear the stories behind their creation and go a little bit deeper into their intended meanings.  i'll be sharing more photos over the next few days.

this too shall pass

Stræberen by Leif Grønhøj

grrr. sometimes everything is just so irritating that you want to scream!

your bra doesn't fit right.

you can't find your garden gloves.

people keep asking you where stuff is.
and you have no idea.
or can't be bothered to explain.
since you're looking for your own gloves.
and if you knew where stuff was, you wouldn't be looking for them.

your child wants to be waited on hand and foot.

which you know is your own fault, since you usually wait on her hand and foot.

but that doesn't make it any less irritating.

the wind keeps blowing the straw you're trying to put out around the strawberries away.

and the straw is making you sneeze.

the chicken wasn't done when you called everyone to dinner.

and your soufflé fell a little bit during the waiting.

there's nothing on t.v.

and they changed the whole online t.v. guide and now it's buggy as hell.

and on top of it you can't find anything.

and all these petty irritations make you lose the awesome happy buzz you had after  a two hour guided sculpture tour in the sunshine (more about that tomorrow). 

and it all makes you wish, just a little bit, for menopause to come already so you can be done with PMS.

tho' you're still irritated at that stupid dutch hairdresser for suggesting you were already menopausal for coloring your hair dark last summer.

whatever.

this too shall pass.

but a cocktail would help.

why can't people just be normal?

on facebook i've subscribed to a few blogs and pages that are focused on sustainable living and/or foraging. while this means that i learn a lot of new things and get a lot of new ideas, it also means that occasionally, i stumble across things that make me throw up a little bit in my mouth.

because what is up with the sustainable living people? i feel like there are two extremes - either those who homeschool for christ or snotty hipster urbanists. i feel a bit like those of us who are more or less normal end up squeezed out. not to mention that i find myself feeling hesitant to identify myself as someone who is attempting to live more sustainably by foraging and gardening and making my own stuff because i'm neither gaga for god, nor do i have a hipster bone in my body (unless you count the tiny tattoo on my left second toe).

i know that there are a lot of normal people out there who are trying to live more sustainably (and i share a blog or two with a number of them) - whether this means seeking alternative energy sources or consuming less or making pesto from backyard weeds or starting a CSA of your own or buying appliance repair parts and fixing it themselves instead of buying new appliances, or making gifts instead of buying them - but i would like to hear more from them.

i guess it's like politics - it seems like the lunatics are the most visible.

and because of that, we get lists of things people don't spend their money on that include newspapers - on the grounds that they don't have the time to use the coupons anyway. no mention of the news at all in the reason - as if newspapers are about coupons (which may explain the state of the newspaper industry in the US). and then there was the frightening commenter who mentioned that she didn't spend money on toilet paper because at her house they used the family cloth. (singular.)

the fact that people like this are homeschooling their children deeply frightens me.

(by the way, i am intentionally not linking to these blogs, as i don't want to be responsible for sending visitors their way, but if you email me, i'll be happy to tell you where to look.)

i think living more sustainably and consuming less is a process. and it's hard work. i go up and down and i still crave far too many things (shiny electronics and chanel nail polish come to mind). but i'm working on it. and i'd love to read about others who are working on it who aren't doing it for jesus or to be the next unabomber or to be a hipster snob. i think the planet needs all of us to be thinking more sustainably. but it's pretty off-putting if i have to share used toilet paper with my family...