Tuesday, September 08, 2009

blog camp fears: some founded and most unfounded

photo of me in flamingo stance (there was something wrong with my shoe) by kristina

who am i at blog camp? am i who i really am? am i somehow more or less? am i at ease in myself? do i behave differently? will we click? will everyone belong? are those stupid little hairs i burned off going to stick up so i look like i'm trying to contact my home planet? will they like me? will they like the house? will they feel comfortable here? am i like my blog? if i am, is that a good thing? has my blog somehow presented a picture of myself that doesn't match me? have i been misleading? these questions swirl in my mind in the lead-up to blog camp, that doesn't really change, even tho' we've now had three.

i think the worries are stronger when it's my house. the house is such a reflection of who i am, who WE are as a family, that if the blog campers don't like it or feel it's not as they thought it was from my going on and on about it here, it will feel like that much more a rejection of me. and nobody wants to feel rejected. not that i felt that way at all, but that's my worry, every time, before blog camp begins.

but it turns out that all of those worries are totally unfounded, because the blog campers are wonderful, warm, real, non-judgmental, open people who don't think like that at all. and that the whole weekend is filled with laughing and drinking wine and gin and tonic sorbets and eating and taking pictures and laughing (have i mentioned laughing) and telling stories and making things and talking and getting to know one another.

but there were a few things i should have worried about...like were those orange tights a bit much? should i really stand on one leg to adjust my shoe and risk looking like a flamingo when there are people with cameras in the vicinity? or how awful our ancient we-can't-actually-remember-how-old-it-is toyota looks and what a bad impression it makes to pile people into it to drive home. and how embarrassing it might be to leave scones in the oven 'til they are but a lump of charcoal. and serving enough water to go with the wine. and how junior-high level jealous i could be at how incredibly thin and gorgeous jelica is despite the fact that she refuses to eat vegetables and can put away chocolate and quite a few red velvet cupcakes (insert audible sigh here).  that i should have asked the cleaning girls to make sure the cobwebs were gone from the map ceiling. i could undoubtedly go on, but it's making me mildly depressed, so i'll stop.

interesting to read back over this and realize all of my fears about blog camp were really fears about myself and none of them were really about the gorgeous, fabulous women who came to blog camp. you guys obviously rocked.

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don't forget to stop by here this week for more photos of blog camp. 
i really do adore our across ö/øresund project.

14 comments:

B said...

For what it's worth, I think the orange tights totally rock! As do you! :)
Already looking forward to BC 3.0. I'll be there this time!

SE'LAH... said...

smooth tights. lovely shot. can't wait to see more of blog camp.

Stacey said...

Isn't that how most of us think? That unsured-ness... I am absolutely in awe of you being so incredibly generous with yourself and your home to invite so many travelers. You are amazingly innovative and deserving of wearing the orange tights! Rock on! (If I wore orange with my complexion the only thing noticable would be how green my skim looked in contrast!)

Lynnae said...

I love reading about blog camp!

marinik said...

can i just say... that is the best flamingo pose ever :)..tights and all... and you held it steady as if posing....you sure this shot wasn't staged??? lol
the fears you talk about i have every time company is coming over... let alone fabulous blog camp ladies...
sounds to me like everyone was having way too much fun to even notice the cobwebs ;)

The Archduchess said...

You are rocking the orange tights.
I'm sure most of us feel that way anytime someone visits, and it usually goes equally well. I love reading about your blogtastic adventures!

Char said...

rock those tights baby - rock 'em

MissBuckle said...

I had the thin envy too. But also for you, Glamour Girl.

Soozie said...

Bright tights are a rock chick wardrobe staple - the brighter the better. Hey, if you've got, rock it!

Funny the things we worry about isn't it?

cheekyketek said...

The tights are the shit. Therefore, everything else was, too. One of these days, Julie, I'm coming to your blog camp. Watch out!

Optimistic Pessimist said...

honestly....your tights are fabulous and i can't stop staring every time i see them.

Jelica said...

the orange tights were cool but the (orange) shoes were way cooler. in fact, i kept looking at your feet during that walk around lund :D

i definitely feared i wouldn't fit in, and that it would be awkward when everyone else leaves. needless to say...

and those cupcakes were delicious and too tempting. maybe i need to eat some veggies this week to balance it all out :)

lea said...

hey, looks and sounds like you had a good time! really do like the way you write and interesting to read about your thoughts on blog camp. i have been considering going - sounds like so much fun, but i'm still not sure if i'm ready to leave the blogosphere : )

Pia K said...

following the link with in i found my way here, and i can probably relate to a lot of things here... what we are in blog may definitely not reflect the complete us irl. but those tights, they are truly awesome!! and the shoes, well that particular el naturalista model i'm still coveting:)